A woman should not mourn for any dead person more than three days except her husband, for whom she should mourn four months and ten days

Arabic text

عَنْ أُمِّ عَطِيَّةَ رَضيَ اللهُ عنها أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللهِ صَلَّى اللهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ: «لَا تُحِدُّ امْرَأَةٌ عَلَى مَيِّتٍ فَوْقَ ثَلَاثٍ إِلَّا عَلَى زَوْجٍ أَرْبَعَةَ أَشْهُرٍ وَعَشْرًا، وَلَا تَلْبَسُ ثَوْبًا مَصْبُوغًا إِلَّا ثَوْبَ عَصْبٍ، وَلَا تَكْتَحِلُ، وَلَا تَمَسُّ طِيبًا إِلَّا إِذَا طَهُرَتْ نُبْذَةً مِنْ قُسْطٍ أَوْ أَظْفَارٍ».

Translation

’Umm ‘Atiyyah (may Allah be pleased with her) reported that the Messenger of Allah (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) said: "A woman should not mourn for any dead person more than three days except her husband, for whom she should mourn four months and ten days. She should not wear dyed clothes (while in mourning) except ‘Asb (an unattractive Yemeni garment), nor should she apply kohl or touch perfume, except when she becomes purified (from her menses), as she may then apply a little Qust or Azhfār (types of incense)."

Explanation

The Prophet (may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him) forbade women from mourning—by abandoning adornment such as perfume, kohl, jewelry, and beautiful clothing—over a deceased person, whether a father, brother, son, or anyone else, for more than three days, except in the case of mourning for a husband, which is for four months and ten days. During this mourning period for her husband, she is not to wear any dyed garments made for adornment, except for ‘Asb garment—a Yemeni cloth dyed before being woven. She should also not apply kohl for beautification or use perfumes or aromatic substances, except when she performs Ghusl (ritual bath) from her menstrual cycle—she may then use a tiny piece of Qust or Azhfār, two well-known types of incense, not as perfume, but to remove any unpleasant odor. She may pass it gently over the vaginal area affected by menstrual blood, not for the purpose of being perfumed.

Benefits

• Ihdād (mourning) means: abstaining from adornment and all that may invite a marriage proposal. Thus, a woman observing Ihdād must avoid all jewelry, all types of perfume, kohl, and garments worn for adornment.
• It is prohibited for a woman to mourn for a deceased person for more than three days, except for her husband.
• Higlighting the husband's status, as no one else is mourned for more than three nights.
• Permissibility of mourning for three days or less, as a means of relieving emotional distress.
• A woman must observe mourning for her husband for four months and ten days, unless she is pregnant, in which case her mourning period ends upon delivery.
• She is permitted to wear dyed clothing that is not intended for adornment, and the standard for identifying such clothing is based on common custom.

Topics

• Jurisprudence and Juristic Principles
• Family Jurisprudence
• Waiting Period